In
India, there are those who have it all: money, families, families with
connections, a decent education and a job..
and then there are those who don't. Mainly due to circumstances of their
families, or the families' economy and mere ill luck. No education, no money,
no means, no guidance, no unemployment benefits. These are the people who
have my respect. They take nothing lying down, don't pout about their
misfortune, these are my fellow citizens who dust their misery aside, buck up
and say, "Give me work to do, I need the money" .
It
could be a man who shows up at my doorstep and offers to be my driver. With the
traffic we deal with, and the several modes of transportation ranging from
animals to bicycles and motorcycles and cars and auto-rickshaws and
trucks........a driver to ease the blood pressure hikes??? Oh yes, sir. Hired.
During my first few months of being married, a middle aged woman who knocked at my door when I was pregnant and said,
"Let me work for you, I need the money, you need help" and I said,
"Please come in". She washed my clothes and my dishes, swept the
floor, drank a cup of tea and got paid monthly- Not a bad idea. We chatted
about our families and giggled at the neighbors. My maid(for the most part)was content with the money given, the leftover meals, the used clothes.... She knew how to manipulate me by her constant demand for a salary hike or the threat of quitting, but I knew better than to let her be hired by my neighbor who would pay her more.
And
so I came to hire a driver, an occasional cook, a gardener, a painter, an
electrician,a plumber and a grocery
delivery boy. All needed the money and yes, I needed the help. This reminds me
of another maid that helped us for years, she was fiercely motivated to educate
her sister because she had never had a chance at education. I did teach her to
write her name and read the newspaper. Good times!
Then
came my move to the DIY country. The land of U-Haul. I paint my rooms myself, and wake up the next
day with aching muscles. Feeling the brunt of having been spoilt? The walls glare at me.. Feeling
judged for their many boo boos? I drive
my own car up and down, love the freedom but hate the technicalities. Esp. the
oil changes and checking the brakes and oh! the car washes.
You
can imagine my surprise when the first American handyman charged $50 for the
first hour and finished his job in 10 minutes. Or the painters we hired charged
us so much, we seriously contemplated how badly injured we'd get if we fell off
the roof painting the house ourselves.
So while I ponder the ease of life in the US with my dishwasher, washer
and dryer and vacuum cleaner which easily replaces the need of an Indian maid,
I bet my relatives wonder if I indeed eat bon-bons and watch soap-operas all
day long and drive around shopping away. Sure, I can hire a maid here....... at the cost of an arm and a leg!
I
try as I might explain to them and my kids, that shopping in the US is still
getting every item off of the shelves and putting in the cart, pushing it to
the counter, lifting every item off the cart and putting it on the conveyor
belt, and once it is swiped and bagged and paid for, I still haul the bags and
put it back in to the cart. Once I reach the car, every bag is hauled into the
car and at home, every one of those bags is hauled into the house and every
single item is put away.
This maid has had her strength training and is tired
for the time being!! Where's the remote and the bon-bons?
IAS - International Aaya Service is option you may explore. Bring over an Indian relative who is craving to visit the US; give her/him a six-month "holiday" (visitor's visa does not last longer) and send her/him home with the dignity of the status of "an America returned aunty/uncle!" Make sure that person takes home a few pairs of faded jeans (perhaps form the Salvation Army).
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